Tasty Tariff Noodles
Disclaimer: Sorry, indie no can donate _more_ $$$$$ to poor folks, like she did in the past. BUT, she can help her fellow poor folks adapt to eat delicious budget meal.
Today's recipe features a custom CHARACTER named RECIPE PETE
~~~~~~
RECIPE PETE has a recipe for U
~~~~~~
>> Recipe Pete is a sturdy-looking black cowboy. He exaggerates his syllables in a way that is a fantastic imitation of the white American cowboy, so much that you can see him in his native African plains with his continental-specific cows, where he eats mostly vegetarian.
Recipe Pete is a fantastic actor with much charisma oozing out of his voice and demeanor.
SETTING:
>> Recipe Pete is standing outside with a wok over a heated grill. Maybe it's in Africa, maybe Texas -- who knows?
He looks directly into the viewer's line of sight and smiles, with a little jump in his step.
~~~~
"Howdy there! Did you ever git yer'self a packet of them ramen noodles and wonder what to do with them that ain't a SOUP? Well, I gotcha a fan-taaaaabulous recipe right here, today.
Don't git a bowl o' sty-ro-FOAM ramen noodles, mind you. The regular old crin-kle-eeee packIT of ramen noodles is what works best, costs less.
>> He grins at his almost rhyme, and holds up the crinkly packet of noodles. He squeezes it, and makes it crinkle. An eager looking, somewhat scrawny young dog appears behind him, excitedly bouncing when he hears the sound.
>> Recipe Pete smiles at the pup and continues.
"We're goin' to make these noodles into a REC-I-PEEEE for those dark day bank account BLUUUUUUES. Recipeeee Pete gotcha covered.
>> He rips open the packet of noodles and dumps everything on his cutting board where there are neatly arranged:
BOTTLE of Soy Sauce
JAR of Peanut Butter (crunchy)
Sirachi sauce \ ( can also use dry red chilis)
Fresh garlic,
Fresh scallions,
Fresh broccoli
An onion. 
>> He continues, speaking slowly.
"See that lil' tinfoil packIT? we are gonna
mix that dry packIT up with
some seeeeeeRACHA sauce,
some soysoySOY SAUCE, garlic,
and about a tablespoon or so
of that there jar o' pea-nut- butter!
If you need to add some boiled water to thin out that sauce, you do that. Just a bit goes far."
>> Recipe Pete whisks the ingredients together, energetically. He looks up from his cookin' station, showing the warm reddish-orange sauce dripping down from the whisk
"Mmmmm, you gotcha yerself one of the tastiest budget meals you could have with these noodles.
Now we make the veg_ta_bles to go with it.
IOnions? Always use onions. Slice them reaaaaaal thin, and wok them up until they barely golden. Then you whatever veg-ta-bles you love.
Me? I personally love the broccoli, so we gonna putcha some broc-co-LEEE in there wok, some mushrooms sliced and stir fry those up."
>> Recipe Pete woks together the vegetables, tossing them expertly until they're steamy. He empties the wok into the saucy bowl of red sauce.
"Now we take out those veg and boil the noodles with about half a cup of water. The point here, folks? The point is NOT to make a soup. We're making a Thai Pad style nood. "
>> Recipe Pete boils the ramen noodles until they are al-dente and tosses the veg and sauce together in a final flourish.
THE END
***
Do send a big handsome pile of 
to @emsenn if you enjoyed this story.
